Masking/MASK-ing/

Consciously or unconsciously hiding one's neurodivergent traits to fit in with neurotypical expectations.

Andy the squirrel, mascot for NDlexicon

Andy says:

Imagine having to wear a really uncomfortable costume all day just so people will treat you normally. That's what masking can feel like. It's exhausting!

Updated 2025-08-17
Sources: Dr. Michelle Mowery, Casey Williams
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Detailed Explanation

Masking, also called camouflaging, involves consciously or unconsciously suppressing natural neurodivergent traits and behaviors to fit in with neurotypical social expectations. This can include forcing eye contact, suppressing stimming, copying others' social behaviors, or developing scripts for social interactions. While masking can help neurodivergent people navigate social situations, it often comes at a significant psychological and physical cost.

Community Context

Many neurodivergent people, especially women and girls, learn to mask from a young age as a survival strategy. The neurodivergent community increasingly recognizes masking as both a necessary skill for navigating an unaccommodating world and a source of significant stress and burnout. There's growing advocacy for creating environments where masking is unnecessary.

Costs and Benefits

  • Potential short-term benefits: safety, reduced stigma, smoother navigation of rigid settings
  • Costs: exhaustion, anxiety/depression, identity confusion, delayed diagnosis, autistic burnout

Unmasking Safely

  • Choose contexts and people where safety and acceptance are likely
  • Practice micro-unmasking: allow natural stims, reduce forced eye contact, use comfortable communication styles
  • Consent-based sharing: disclose on your terms; scripts help
  • Build supportive circles (peer groups, allies) and exit strategies for unsafe situations

For Schools and Workplaces

  • Normalize accommodations: no forced eye contact; stimming and aids (fidgets, sunglasses, headphones) are acceptable
  • Write norms that value content over "performance" of eye contact or tone
  • Provide quiet spaces, flexible participation, and predictable routines
  • Offer training on neuro-affirming practices

Myths vs Facts

  • Myth: "Masking is lying."
    • Fact: Masking is a survival skill in non-accommodating environments.
  • Myth: "Everyone masks the same."
    • Fact: Masking varies by person, culture, and context.
  • Myth: "Just stop masking."
    • Fact: Unmasking must be balanced with safety, power dynamics, and consent.

Quick Tips

  • Track energy after social situations to spot high-mask contexts
  • Practice micro-unmasking (natural stims, comfortable eye gaze) in safe spaces
  • Prepare phrases for opting out of small talk or switching channels (text/email)
  • Build a supportive circle that accepts your communication style

Do / Don't

  • Do: choose safety-first unmasking; set boundaries and limits on high-demand time
  • Do: use scripts and aids (sunglasses, headphones) without apology
  • Don't: force eye contact or suppress regulation needs to “fit in”
  • Don't: assume everyone benefits from the same social norms

Scripts (Examples)

  • "I follow better when we keep cameras optional."
  • "I’m listening; I don’t always do eye contact when I focus."
  • "Text works best for me for details; can we confirm in writing?"

Scientific Context

Research shows that masking is associated with increased rates of anxiety, depression, and burnout in neurodivergent populations. Studies indicate that the cognitive load of constant masking can be exhausting and may contribute to delayed diagnosis, particularly in girls and women.

Language Notes

Also referred to as 'camouflaging' in academic literature. Some prefer the term 'compensating' to emphasize the adaptive nature of these behaviors.

Related Terms

Sources

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